If you thought I did not know myself back then...….damn, you were right!!! I tell you what!!! I so love and appreciate every single soul that has crossed my path. I no longer feel like the Universe is laughing at me, we laughing together!! What do I contribute to my learning besides interactions with other souls? Self interaction, self love that lead to self integration. Do not think that just because I'm on a high vibe that I never come down, that would be a bold face lie and I don't do that shit. I am part of this Universe just like you and I have my bad days.
The thing that I do different now, is not be so damn hard on myself; like...why? I do not have to keep everything so nicely tightly wrapped in a neat little package....I do not fit. Maybe other people do but what does that have to do with me? Nada. I struggled with myself even just being in a neutral in emotion; being still enough to see how energies around me really affected me. It was not about putting the blame on other people, it was to see where the real blame was to be put; honestly, it was on both. Buuuuuut, my concern is only about my blame. Again, what other people do is none of my damn business and I realized that. Once I sat with that for a while....I realized that no one can tell me shit!!!
Why do I feel that way? Because my ass is gonna do what the fuck I want anyway. I know my heart and my intentions and even through that; there are still lessons to be learned. I was built for this life so I am going to embrace ALL of it! When you get to a certain time in your life, you just cannot afford to give out fucks. I am someone who loves to help and be of service but what good is that if my services are not wanted? It is not that I am not good enough, I was just not in the right place yet. And that is ok. All this b.s. about having to hit some certain aspect in your life at this certain point of time is the biggest load of crap we have been fed. Why the fuck do I need to do what they did? They did not even like it. It is not strength to continue to endure what other's say is the "right path" to take. Fuck your path! And yea, I cuss. Lol, no fucks given!!!
The mistakes that I have made and continue to make are part of my path and you cannot take that away from me; gon' head and try. No one can take my success either. Even I tried to take away things that were for my highest good, Spirit did not fight me on it either; shit fell away. When I finally realized what I did, my ass went back, humbled and apologized. Not only to myself but to the people that meant the most to me. Lol and Spirit....repeatedly!!!!
All the trials and tribulations are what we need to go through to truly celebrate life by fucking living it and not struggling to survive. Every day we see people with greater and lesser abundance then ourselves and have the audacity to think that that we could not be in either position. We have all seen people rising to fame( in whatever spectrum of their life) and we have seen people fall; it can happen to anyone at anytime. The point is not to let your heart sink into your stomach, no matter which direction you are in. Yea, its fucking hard to not engage in fear when that is all we have been programmed to do. Why do we only focus on the bad? WHY???
Focusing on the bad all the time just means that your ass is bored; go do something. Stop sitting around trying to analyze what is supposed to be and just see what is there. If you do not like it, you can change it. No, not everything happens in the blink of an eye but if you use your True Eye, you will guide yourself to your own paradise.
Much Love and Ase!